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Real kindness or acts of ego

September 19, 2018

There is much written about kindness, many videos showing displays of kindness, many orchestrated for the camera giving a member of society who is down on their luck an uplift with money or goods. Kindness we are told, is something we do to help be it for people, animals or nature.

There is a kindness which is from the heart, from an inner desire or motivation that the person feels they want to change something, help or make things better. Then there are those acts of kindness which are not so much from the heart but from a position of guilt or psychological need for the ego to feel good.

It is not uncommon for financially successful individuals to donate to a cause and have their name on at the top of the project, so everyone knows what they have done. It fulfils their ego, strokes their mind gratification of “Look how kind and good I am”. Recently, there has been much media attention given to an extremely high earning individual who has given a substantial sum of money to support and create projects in their country and have been severely criticised for the way they have made their money. Conversely, there are also very high earners who quietly give to projects yet few people know what they have done.

Kindness is a natural characteristic from the heart, it’s not something you have to think about, you would naturally act, give, do in the moment because it is such a natural thing to do! Help the old person across the road is a kind act, you do it because you see someone who needs assistance, so you just help. To wake up and think “right I’m going to do 3/5 acts of kindness today” is more of an ego approach and in truth only massages the ego to feel good about itself because ‘I have helped some people today’. Do it because if feels right, not because it impresses people.

In the western world most live from a sense of fear with it daily being reinforced by the media which constantly influences the populations beliefs that it’s an unsafe world we live in and gives evidence that it’s all true! Not only does the reporting and TV programmes reinforce this it also sets out images and behaviours that the population believe they should follow and an expectation they should fit into its model of life. We have moved so far away from being and acting in a way that it ‘true to who we are’ that most have lost their connection with their inner guidance and being their own person! We love the stories of people being themselves and living their passions and purpose in life but remain in our comfort zone!

Kindness, compassion and generosity are our natural inner states, but we create them from a judgemental mindset and get distracted by it. We have lost connection with our inner world of values, love, knowing, motivation, gifts and purpose. But it’s from our inner world we naturally engage in kindness, we don’t think we have to do it, we just instinctively act!

Most people are doing the same things day in day out and will continue until they retire, die or can’t work anymore through ill health. There is more to life when we open our eyes, awaken to what’s intuitively is calling us to bring to the world, our skills, our passions, our talents, all the things that give us joy and that sweet inner smile.

Kindness, yes be kind even if you do have to think about it because every act helps. But, then find ways to let go of the anxiousness that maybe running your life so the doors to who ‘you are’ can be always open and the connection with the inner understanding will guide you to step into your meaningful and purposeful life. What are you waiting for!

Roy Martin MBE has been helping people transform themselves for over twenty years, guiding and mentoring them to develop lives and businesses that have meaning and purpose. He helps people gain focus and direction to follow their inner calling and talents whether that’s personally, professionally or in business.

He helps people see life from their unique perspective and understanding, a ‘letting go’ of the minds resistance, pain and emotional disharmony allowing levels of awareness that are life transforming.

He runs life enhancing mentorship programmes, events and gives talks inspiring people into the ‘More of life’ that is filled with meaning and purpose.

www.roymartin.biz